The Smile-and-Nod Teacher Is Secretly Quitting

Y'all...I've had a lot on my mind lately. And by a lot, I mean A LOT.

This morning I woke up to not one, not two, not three, but FOUR messages from teachers who were feeling completely, well...heartbroken.

And after talking with them back and forth all morning long over the app that we use, Voxer, I came to the disturbing conclusion that they're all feeling a loss of HOPE. They're losing HOPE that our administrators, our district leaders, and our principals across the entire nation will actually give them the support they need. They have given up. They're realizing that the people at the top who they've been conditioned to think have the answers, know the strategies, and will give them the support they need...well, aren't going to give it to them. In fact, the people at the top aren't even making them feel SEEN or HEARD.

They’ve lost hope that district leaders will actually support them.

They’ve stopped waiting for the admin team to show up.

And the saddest part?

They’re still showing up with a smile and a nod… while quietly planning their exit.

"I had always been told that I was a good teacher, that I had good classroom management. But that year things were just different. Their social skills were lagging, and I didn't know how to teach them." "I was going home crying everyday thinking maybe I'm not meant to do this."

Here are some of the TRUE stories educators have shared about their admin:

They're staring at their phones during PLC meetings with their staff. They don't even look UP at their teachers when they're literally crying out for help with behaviors, and aide support, and next steps.

For YEARS they have not given the support that their teachers are asking for, and they have had educators (incredible educators) leaving...yes, RESIGNING from their schools...since November! And it's not because of the kids. It's because of the lack of support from the top!

And then there's other principals who don't even acknowledge their teachers when they walk into their classrooms. The stories I hear about hiring teachers into "coaching roles" and "made-up positions" in their schools, and across their districts, is literally creating one of the most toxic work environments I have ever experienced. Now don't get me wrong, there are some phenomenal educators who would make phenomenal coaches at their schools. But the vast majority??? They view this change of role as a stepping stone, as a promotion, as a life upgrade, as a way to "get out of the classroom." And honestly, when THOSE people are put into positions of "power" across your site...it becomes so incredibly toxic.

The amount of stories that I've heard, and the number of experiences that I've had, where teachers in these roles have literally talked behind their colleagues backs, turned their administrators against them, or embarrassed them in front of their staff and students...I've completely lost count. They continue to cycle the negative toxicity through the halls of their schools, and I'm telling you...when you have the people at the front desk who can feel that yuck...oh baby, you are stuck! And ain't nobody wanna feel stuck in the yuck...NOBODY.

Now mix THAT with an administrator who is going through some of their own mental stuff. Maybe there's health things, or kid stuff, or spouse, or family, or parent, or home life things...maybe truly traumatic things…happening. Call it whatever you want. But if your administrator is lacking the emotional intelligence to be able to see through the toxicity, or even worse, to feed into it...you're in for a world of hurt.

Because here's the deal. What happens after that is that our teachers, the ADULTS who are caring for our children, are leaving their classrooms every single day in tears. They're not only feeling defeated, but they're completely depleted. They have nothing left to give. Nothing left to give someone else, and nothing left to pour back into themselves.

The reality is this -

They're going home to their own sh*!t. Their own kids' stuff, our spouse stuff, or family, friend, home life, health stuff. Every single one of us is going through someTHING. And we carry all of those invisible things on our hearts and swimming around in our minds all day. Most of us stuff it down, or try to work through it with our "Instagram Therapy" or we end up exploding because we can't quite keep it down any longer.

If the teachers have nothing left to give, how on EARTH are they going to be able to teach our children? And in the world of education, that's what our teachers are SUPPOSED to do. But we're human. All of us are. Going through one storm in our lives after the next, and the next. And if our educators are feeling hopeless, and lost, and unsupported, then no teaching...and ultimately, no LEARNING, is going to take place.

It's not the way in which we're teaching our students to read or write. And it's not our PBIS systems or character assemblies that are going to make a difference in the lives of our students. In order to truly support and teach our kids, the adults in the room need to feel supported first.

They’re not complaining. They’re detaching.

These are the teachers who used to raise their hands in meetings.

Now they’re quiet.

They used to ask for resources.

Now they’ve stopped asking altogether.

Not because they’re okay.

But because they’ve stopped believing anyone will help.

They sit in PLCs where the principal never looks up from their phone.

They ask for support with behaviors—and get ghosted.

They cry in staff lounges and feel like no one hears them.

And slowly… they check out.

We have a BIG problem on our hands. When it comes to our education system, the answer isn't going to come from another curriculum. The adults in the room...in ALL rooms...need support. THEY need the skills. And they need to start listening, SEEing, and ACTING in a way that is going to give everyone exactly what they need.

This loss of hope. This lack of support from the TOP. This negative and toxic and EGOcentric way of being has got to go.

The Problem Isn’t the Kids—It’s the Silence at the Top.

Here’s what most leaders don’t realize:

Even if you’re dealing with your own personal storms (and believe me, I get that), when emotional intelligence is missing at the leadership level, the entire system suffers.

Toxic team dynamics go unchecked.

Burnout becomes contagious.

And the people holding up your entire district start to crumble—quietly.

Want to stop that spiral before it starts?

1. Start the day with connection, not compliance.

Stop leading with what’s missing. Start with what’s working.

Walk through classrooms in the first 15 minutes—not to check boxes, but to say:

“I’m glad you’re here.”

Those five words cost nothing and change everything.

2. Ask one question, and then actually listen.

Try this: “What’s something you wish I saw that I might be missing?”

Then zip it.

Don’t defend. Don’t problem-solve.

Just listen. That moment of validation might be the first breath of air they’ve had all year.

3. Interrupt the toxicity with transparency.

If there’s tension or back-channeling happening on your campus—name it.

You don’t have to solve it on the spot.

But call it out with compassion and courage.

When leaders model honesty, teachers exhale. It’s that simple.

And this is exactly why I launched my podcast.

It’s called Unleashing the BISON, and it’s not your typical “teacher tips” show.

It’s real, raw, and unapologetically honest about what’s actually happening in schools—and what we can do about it.

If you’re a leader who’s tired of losing your best people…

If you’re ready to run into the storm instead of around it…

Then you’re exactly who this podcast is for.

New episodes drop every other Monday—because we don’t have time to wait!

CHECK IT OUT HERE!

"Unleashing the BISON" is a raw, unfiltered podcast that cuts through the noise and delivers hard-hitting truths about the state of education today. Based on the groundbreaking book "Becoming The BISON" by veteran educator and straight-talking consultant Kim Gameroz, this podcast is not for the faint of heart.

Each episode features Kim's signature blend of tough love, practical wisdom, and irreverent humor as she tackles the biggest challenges facing educators head-on. From calling out the cracks in the MTSS pyramid to exposing the flaws in traditional professional development, Kim pulls no punches in her quest to empower teachers and transform schools.

But "Unleashing the BISON" isn't just about Kim's bold opinions. The podcast also showcases the stories of fearless educators who have embraced the BISON mentality and are creating ripples of change in their classrooms and communities. These unfiltered conversations dive deep into the nitty-gritty of what it really takes to be a change-maker in education.

In each episode, you'll discover:

• Actionable strategies for implementing Social Emotional Learning (SEL) that actually work

• Hard-earned lessons on building resilience and overcoming adversity in the classroom

• Unconventional approaches to creating a collaborative and supportive school culture

• Straight talk on aligning your teaching practices with your personal mission and values

• Real-world examples of educators who are breaking the mold and making a difference

• What families and parents can do to get the support their students need to be successful in the classroom and at home

If you're tired of the same old education podcasts that play it safe and offer nothing but fluff, then "Unleashing the BISON" is the podcast you've been waiting for. It's time to stop making excuses and start making change. Join Kim and her community of bold educators and change makers as they unleash the BISON and transform education from the inside out.”

I know it’s heavy.

But I also know one thing for sure:

We can turn this around.

We don’t need more PD binders or compliance checklists.

We need connection, clarity, and courage—from the top down.

And that starts with you.

Let’s unleash the bison.

– Kim

LISTEN TO THE PODCAST HERE!!!